


Proserpine

by linkzeldi



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-07
Updated: 2018-08-07
Packaged: 2019-06-23 14:21:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15608181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/linkzeldi/pseuds/linkzeldi
Summary: A story set in an alternate continuity of Tokyo Ghoul, following the lives of Furuta Nimura, Yoshimura Eto, and Kishou Arima as they meet early on in life and in this scenario, all three of them decide to work together to destroy the twisted world they were born into, and made even further twisted by.A story of two kings, black and white, agreeing to meet each other on opposite sides of the chess board and fight against one another for the sake of the world.





	Proserpine

He had other work to do, but still the blue haired boy dressed in all white lingered in the garden. He was considered one of the lucky ones allowed to roam out of this place, and yet still as much as he loathed it, children could not discard their homes so easily.  
  
The images of flower fields that followed him, often he wondered if it was him clinging to a pleasant memory, or being haunted by an unpleasant reminder. He did not have enough substance within to distinguish for himself. Just then, he heard voices floated by and noticed two children walking and talking amongst themselves.  
  
“Do you remember the story we were talking about in class today? About Persephone?”  
“They taught us the Roman version so it’s Proserpine. Why?”  
“I didn’t really get it.”  
“It’s a simple story, about a god of death who met a beautiful woman in a field of flowers and fell in love at first sight, but then kidnapped her and took her away to the underworld.”  
“Yeah, that’s what I don’t get. Couldn’t he just show his love some other way?”  
“He probably didn’t know how.”

Kishou Arima sighed.  
The names of those children, he should have remembered them but he did not. His visits to this place were getting less and less frequent.  
There were a lot of things he should have remembered.  
  
‘Kishou’ was not his original name. It was one passed down by tradition in the Arima branch. The strongest in the family was given the name ‘Kishou’ as a tradition. When he told his mother about this originally, she made him promise to always remember his original name. Arima was confused by this, as he thought having the name ‘Kishou’ would be an honor, something for a mother to be proud of.  
  
His mother died though, three years ago or was it four..? Perhaps, he could have kept his promise to his dead mother, but soon after she died he started to forget about such things. He was slowly, becoming more and more like a sieve. Don’t confront them, just let these experiences pass through you, it was the only way to survive.  
  
His original name, he had forgotten it, along with the promise, along with the face of his mother. All of those things, to become the man that everybody else saw as Kishou Arima. Even in this garden, removed from the world like Eden, he was still Kishou Arima.  
  
He saw in the distance, a girl with pink hair was watching him from behind one of the great columns that supported the roof of this place. He turned his head to acknowledge her. He could have called out to her or waved, but he did not. As he walked away he was careful not to step on the flowers. Now that he was an adult he could properly appreciate what a miracle it was that flowers were able to grow all the way down here, it must have been some trick of artificial light, and irrigated water.

Just then, something brushed by Arima. He looked to the side slowly to see two children racing past them. The girl with pink hair was watching as well.  
  
A boy and a girl, chasing each other playing a game of tag. He did not remember their names either, the boy with black hair and peek a boo bangs, and the girl with long purple hair. It was rare though, Kishou knew that most boys of that age did not take time to play with the girls. They usually already volunteered themselves to start combat training.  
  
“Awe, come on wait up!” The boy said as he lunged forward. He pushed the girl over, and tripped himself and the both of them fell into the flower garden, knocking petals, bits of stems and leaves into the air recklessly.  
  
“Say… Rize.”

“Mm?”  
  
“I want us to stay just like this. Even if we become old geezers.”  
  
The girl rolled on her side, tucking her hand behind her head. Even though they had been playing rough just a moment ago, she seemed truly at ease, listening to the young boy laugh. Not that she would show it.  
  
“I… I don’t wanna be an old lady, Nimura.”  
  
“Whaaa? Really? It’ll be fun, I know it.”  He sat up, trying to reassure her. His eyes closed, his smile wide. “I just know it will.”  
  
Kishou Arima, expressionless still, walked away from those two children. Only when his head was turned and he was sure nobody else could see, did his lip start to twitch. The girl in pink hair ran up to him. Her head only reached about to his waist. “Ah…” he said to greet her.

“You came down again, even though you’re living on your own now.”  
  
“Yes, I did.”  
  
“Do you want to play, Arima?”  
  
“Shouldn’t you be practicing.”  
  
“I was, but I knew Nimura was going to skip practice again so I came to follow him. He’s always playing around.”  
  
“But doesn’t that mean you’re skipping practice too?”  
  
“Ehhhhhh? That’s way different. I have good reasons to skip.”  
  
“Come on, I’ll walk you there.” Kishou Arima said as he offered her a hand that was much larger than hers. It was the least he could do, and he meant that. The absolute very least was all he could manage in situations like these.  
  
Yet, that girl Hairu of the Ihei branch smiled at him. Arima did not understand why, he felt like he was barely doing anything at all. Whatever warmth that smile had, whatever warmth Hairu’s hand might have held, could not reach a cold person like him. _That was only natural though_ , Arima thought, _there’s no warmth to be found down here a place with only artificial lights._

 

♚

 

Nimura Furuta, otherwise known as Souta Washuu-Furuta, tapped a pen to his paper. He was rather infamous for skipping the classes held for children of the Sunlit Garden, but his family history had always been a point of fascination for him so he wanted to try his best for this assignment.  
  
He was not the most elegant or talented of writers, and he was only eleven years old at the time, so most of what he wrote was just his own stream of consciousness. _There are two types of beings in this world, the innocent lambs humans and the predatory wolves called ghouls. It was only natural, humans and ghouls would fight until one side destroyed the other. It seemed like ghouls had every single natural advantage, they had evolved specifically only to prey on humans, weapons like swords, or even inventions of the modern era bullets did not work on them. However, one time in the past, a clan of ghouls betrayed their own kind to serve humanity they were called the Washuu._

_Even though they sacrificed everything to save humanity, and sold several secrets of their own kind, from the kagune that was turned into artificial kagune known as “quinque” and the weaknesses and limits of ghouls, all to serve humans, they were not accepted by humans. They would always be persecuted for being ghouls, so, they had to hide in the shadows in order to continue helping humans. The Washuu, and the ghouls who ally themselves with the Washuu to fight for the safety of humans are the good ghouls. They fight their fundamentally evil nature that compels them to eat human flesh. The ghouls outside care nothing for others, they devour selfishly, again and again, only thinking of their own survival._

Nimura stopped for a moment, something about this did not seem right. The only ghouls he had ever met were the ones associated with the Washuu. He knew for a fact Rize was a ghoul, and she liked to eat quite a lot. The idea of somebody like Rize being fundamentally evil though did not sit well with him. He did not ever meet a ghoul of the outside world though so it was not like he could contest it. He still felt ill at ease, making statements like this without learning more. He could not help it, he was a naturally curious child. He picked up his pen again, trying to write more.  
  
_The Washuu are like an old noble family, no, they’re like a samurai clan. Back in the day they fought hand in hand with several ghoul hunting clans. Even though ghoul blood runs through our veins, we’re not that different from a normal noble family of humans. There is a main branch, and then several branch families consisting of the descendants of brothers and cousins and what not. The Washuu has accepted a lot of ghouls from outside into its ranks due to their generosity, and because of that our family tree is rather large._ _  
_ _  
_ _The main family head is responsible for producing heirs. However, due to the traditions of nobility he’s assigned to an arranged marriage decided upon by someone else. It’s quite normal then, because these arranged marriages are only for the purposes of producing heirs, that the head of the family will have an affair with a woman he falls for. Sometimes, those affairs result in “illegitimate children” unexpected blessings. It’s not different then when a politician from a major family cheats on his wife because he’s in a loveless marriage. It’s entirely normal. Perhaps… it’s not the most moral thing, but at least the family head is not a deadbeat towards those illegitimate children. They’re accepted into the family and given names too, despite not being full blooded sons, or intended to ever happen, they are “loved.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _Actually, compared to how most illegitimate children conceived out of marriage are treated in the outside world my position is one of privilege. My mom too. I know this for a fact because I am one of the “illegitimate” children, and I’m told over and over again how much I am loved and doted on. There are some that even call me a spoiled brat, but what would they know, those other garden children are just distant relatives to me. I’m special, because I’m a bastard of the main branch at least._

 _I’ll never get to be called “Washuu’ or even call my father ‘Daddy’ in public, but things are fine this way really. I get to play in the flowers all day with my friend, and I don’t have to go to lessons. Even if I skip and play around all day, Tsuneyoshi never gets mad at me. He says I’m gentle just like my mother._ _  
_ _  
_ _Things should just stay this way forever._ Nimura wrote, and then realized that his own essay had gone far off track. He pulled the paper away from the notebook and crumpled it up throwing it aside. There were several other discarded papers just like that in the wastebasket. No matter how hard he tried, he could not write about ‘The Life of the Washuu’ without feeling uneasy. He wondered why... even though he was so happy living like this, playing every day with Rize. Then, he tried to stop thinking about it and smile instead. 

♚

 

“Oh, it’s just you today, Chika.” Nimura complained.  
  
“I think you’re the only one who prefers seeing Tsuneyoshi over me…” Chika sighed and then reached forward with a gloved hand to tuck the boy’s hair behind his ear so he could see both eyes. “And you’re the only one whose bold enough to call me by that name.”

“Why would I call you by a formal name, we’re family aren’t we? Everybody here just calls me Nimura.”  
  
“I suppose so. You should know now that you’re getting old that Tsuneyoshi is a busy man.”

 _How is eleven old?_ Nimura thought, but quickly forgot about it. “So he was too busy to hear my request?”  
  
“Of course not.” Chika said, as he handed Nimura a small wrapped package. A privilege for children of the garden, they were allowed to ask for gifts from the outside world. Nimura was famous, for asking for a lot, and also for the odd requests he made. “You always ask for the strangest things, Nimura.”  
  
“Ah well you know, that’s just me being Nimura the spoiled brat again.” He said with a mischievous smile, before tucking the package close to his chest and running away. He unwrapped the contents and looked at them for himself, a lion mask, and a joke book. The kinds of masks that people would wear to festivals in the outside world, or so he had read about. He smiled, truly, excitement brimming at these presents.  
  
However, less than an hour later that smile had died on Nimura's lips and so had any trace that it ever existed. He sat on the edge of a traditional wooden building, one of many assembled for their communal living down here and sighed. “Even though I got mother the mask like the one in her story, and told her the funniest jokes in this book she did not smile.”  
  
His mother had only a few memories of the outside world. Once, she told Nimura a story about how Tsuneyoshi as a gift took her to a festival with fireworks and everything, and then bought her a mask just like that when she said she liked it. _See, your father is kind to those who please him little Nimura That’s why, around him you must always be smiling._ Nimura thought it was only natural, to smile around your father, but his mother always looked worried when she told him those words…  
  
Even though his mother told him constantly to smile, she had been smiling less and less lately. Nimura requested all kinds of things from the outside world to show her, even running the risk of being called spoiled, or asking too much as an illegitimate child, but no matter what he showed her she had the same distant look on her face.

When she was younger, Nimura thought his mother was the funniest person in the world. Even though his world was too tiny to make a judgment like that, he was entirely confident in that assertion. If he got into a fight with another child, or even got lectured by one of the adults for spending all day playing in the flowers with the daughters, she would always cheer him up. _Smile, Nimura._ She would say in a soft voice. _No matter how hard life is, you can still smile._

Yet, as he grew older, she grew more and more strict. Now, the words _smile. Always smile in front of your father._ They felt more like an order.

“Maybe I should have done a Manzai routine. Oh, but those are impossible to do on your own! N-nandeya, what the hell am I thinking?” He said, comedically smacking at his own forehead even though there was nobody around to watch him.  
  
Or so he thought. Suddenly behind him he heard the soft voice of a young girl. “So, this is what you’re always doing when you skip classes.”  
  
“Huh?” He turned his head around and saw a girl with pink hair in a small bob. She was no older than nine years old. Nimura recognized her. “You’re from the Ihei branch…right?”  
  
“Wow, you skip class so often you can’t even remember the other children’s names. How selfish of you.” She shook her head as if admonishing him, however, in the next moment she reached out grabbing his wrist. “Then let’s get to know each other better. I’m Hairu, Ihei Hairu.”  
  
Nimura was dragged away unwillingly. He had always been that kind of tender spineless child, the other boys his age warned him several times that if he acted so feminine he was going to get walked over. He did not really mind in this moment though as he wanted a distraction to keep him away from thoughts of his mother.

The girl dragged him away until the two of them found a couple of chairs they could sit on. Then, when he sat down in one of them, she climbed over the other chair and rested her head in his lap. “Clean my ears…” She said, handing him a cue tip.  
  
“Okay...If you say so.”  
  
“You’re really easy to order around, you know that?”  
  
“So I’ve been told.” He was warned several times if he did not show more initiative the best job he would ever be offered was pushing around paperwork, but Nimura did not mind that prospect. The only thing he had ever really been good at was reading and writing.  
  
“Hey is something wrong with your mother?”  
  
“Huh? How did you know?  
  
“Because, you were standing outside the Furuta Branch household looking all sad. It’s not that hard to guess.”

“My mother used to laugh a lot… but recently she doesn’t want to talk much or even leave her house.”  
  
“Oh, I see. There’s nothing to worry about then, she’s just going to die soon probably.”  
  
“What!” Nimura said in shock, turning the ear cleaner in her ear too hard. Hairu grabbed the side of her head and curled up in pain.  
  
“Ow! Ow!”  
  
“Ah… sorry…” Nimura pulled the ear cleaner out, and threw it away. He forgot about what he was supposed to be doing, and focused on what Hairu had said so casually instead. “How can you joke about that? Even I wouldn’t tell a joke that mean.”  
  
“Huh? You’re the only one around here who tells lame jokes, Nimura. It’s just the truth there’s no reason to get so upset.” She turned around in his lap, still laying her head in it looked up at the roof. Most housing areas with great fields of flowers, and long stretches of green did not have roofs. However, the sunlit garden was hidden away from the rest of the world that hated ghouls and people like them for their own protection, and because of that it had a roof. “My mother died recently too you know. That’s just what happens down here.”  
  
“Oh… I… I’m sorry.”   _That’s just what happens down here? What do you know about what happens down here.  
_  
“Huh? Why do you look so pitiful right now, Nimura? Gosh you really are soft just like they say. It wasn’t a bad thing. It wasn’t sad. Because that day when my mother died, Arima reached out his hand and acknowledged me for the first time. I was really happy that day, because he comforted me.”  
  
“Oh… okay…”

Nimura always played with the daughters, he was quite infamous for doing that and not sparring with the rest of the boys but he did not quite understand a girl like Hairu.

 

♚

 

The conversation with Hairu did little to stop the boy from feeling ill at ease. There really was only one person who could take his mind off of things when he was like this, now that his mother was no longer in the mood for tellings jokes ever anymore.  
  
He went to find Rize again, despite playing with her just yesterday. She was the kind of girl that got bored easily, so he thought it was fortunate she did not get bored of him just yet. In fact when he finally found her in a field of flowers she seemed like she had been waiting for him. “Hey, Nimura... “ Her hands folded behind her back, she kicked at one of the flowers while he ran to catch up with her, stopping just in front of her.

“What’s with that smile, it looks like you’re plotting something…”  
  
“So what if I was?”  
  
“Well if that’s the case I hope it’s something fun.”  
  
“It’s definitely something fun for me at least,” Rize said, giggling girlishly as she brought a hand to her mouth to suppress those same giggles. “Let’s play CCG officer and ghoul again.”  
  
“Oh, okay…” Nimura said, going along easily enough with what she wanted, as he usually let himself be pulled along by her whims. “So, do you want to be the CCG officer or the ghoul today.”  
  
“I’ll be the ghoul!” Rize said with a mischievous smile, and suddenly Nimura heard the tearing of fabric. From behind the white robe she was wearing, something red emerged and suddenly struck forward at him.  
  
“Waaaaaaahhh, what’s that?” Nimura jumped back, and then fell on his behind. The single tendril of red flexed its scales for a moment before chasing after him again. Nimura had to scramble to his feet and start to run.  
  
“Come on Nimura, if you’re the CCG officer you need to put up more of a fight than that otherwise, I won’t have any fun.”

“This isn’t very fun for me you know…” Nimura said as he darted back and forth, clumsily avoiding every strike forward of the strange red claw organ. That was kagune, an organ which belonged only to ghouls. Technically, he knew about them in theory from classes, but Rize was so young he did not think she would be able to use one like this.  
  
“But it’s sooo fun for me.” Suddenly, the kagune which had been snaking around only lazily striking at him since Rize was only teasing him after all, hardened and struck forward. To Nimura it was a sword being swung at him, he dived out of the way once more in a panic but this time he was not fast enough. The sharp side of the kagune hit his arm, and grazed it deeply. Nimura was knocked over by the rest of the blow.  
  
Rize gasped, her kagune disappearing as suddenly as it appeared. “Nimura! You weren’t supposed to get cut!” She said, not seeming to realize her fault in this. As she ran up to check if he was okay, suddenly a voice called out from behind her.  
  
“Don’t touch him!”

Nimura recognized the voice immediately, it was the upset screams of his mother. He looked to Rize, and then his mother, and then suddenly jumped to his feet. “Revive! See, I’m fine. I can keep playing, don’t worry.”  
  
Even as he said that and waved his arms to make sure others could see he was alright, he was bleeding severely from one arm, so much so his white robe was turning red. His mother, however, walked past Rize, and grabbed him by his other hand, pulling him away from her.  
  
“I’m sorry…” Nimura muttered again, not looking his mother in the eye. “Are you mad at Rize now?”  
  
“No.” His mother said, trying to shut out all emotion from her voice. “I pity her. Developing a kagune already at her age, that poor girl, they’re never going to let her have peace.”  
  
Nimura shuddered. _Who are they?_ If there was somebody who was going to interrupt his peaceful days, he wanted to know about them. At the moment though he was only a child who could cling to his mother’s hand as he was dragged away by her.

 

♚

 

Even if he was spoiled, it’s not like Nimura was unobservant. He knew earlier that Hairu was trying to tell him something, so, the next possible time he was free he went looking for her all on his own.  
  
“I don’t need you today, my ears are already clean,” Ihei Hairu said, walking away from him.  
  
“Why did you tell me that stuff earlier…”  
  
“Dunno…” Hairu kicked at one of the flowers, sending the flower head of one of the plants flying off with her childish indiscretion.  “I just thought it was kind of dumb what you said earlier.”  
  
“Huh?”  
  
“You know about things being exactly like this when we grow up. You know it’s not going to be like that, right?”  
  
“Uh… because we might join the CCG, right? Or have to hunt ghouls all on our own.”  
  
Hairu shook her head, causing the pink locks of her hair to fall on her face. “No, not that. I mean how we’re never going to grow up at all.”

“Huh? You’re joking right? That’s impossible. Neverland is just a fake place in a story. Kids always grow up.”

“We won’t, we’ll die before we get the chance. I know it’s real because my mom told me. You know how I sound funny.”  
  
“Well yeah, but I thought it was rude to mention.”  
  
“My accent is from my mother, she was a ghoul in Hokkaido who was kidnapped into this family.”  
  
“Don’t you mean adopted?”  
  
“That’s just what they call it to make it sound nice. My mom said it was a nice offer, but she didn’t really have a choice, anyway quit interrupting me Nimura and listen I’m telling you this for your own good because it’s what my mom told me for my good. Anyway, she told me just before she was taken away that because I had a human father, I would die before I ever got to grow up like she did.”  
  
“Why… why would she tell you something so horrible.”  
  
At this, Ihei Hairu tilted her head truly oblivious. The childlike smile had never left her face as she told this whole story. “What are you talking about? Who cares if my time is shorter than everybody else’s. That just means I have to enjoy it while I can. It’s a happy thing she told me.” Hairu’s smile widened. “I’m happy now it’s because she told me that that I know what to do with my life. I’m not going to waste all my time playing around like you, Nimura.”

 _Oh, so that’s why she told me. It’s because you’re always working hard to please the adults around you that you hate seeing me be spoiled, huh?_ Nimura thought, however, his very being rejected the information Hairu had just told him. She probably just made it up to hurt him. The fact that he would die young could not be true. Not at all.  
  
There was no way that it could be true, because he had just told Rize that the future would be fun together. That growing up would be fun for both of them. If what Hairu had said was true, that meant he would be breaking his promise to her, he’d be unable to grow up with her. He’d have lied to her.  
  
_No, she’s lying, not me. I’ll show her, I’ll show her it’s a lie._ “That’s a terrible thing to say…” Nimura said, in a low muttering voice that almost sounded like a growl.  
  
“It’s not terrible, it’s just the truth.” Hairu said with another oblivious tilt of her head.  
  
“Don’t make up lies just because you’re jealous… just because you’re jealous my father loves me and you’re just some forgotten branch family member!” Nimura said, as suddenly he felt strength and violence rise up in him from nowhere. He pushed her over and ran past her. He hated fighting, he never even participated in sparring practice, when he and Rize played, Rize was the one who always pushed him around. He wondered where all of this anger had come from, he stared at his own hands for a moment and looked back at Hairu for a moment in regret, before turning away for good.

 

♚

 

He knew what he had to do to show Hairu, to pay her back for telling such mean lies. In the maze of buildings that made up the sunlit garden compound, Nimura knew there was a room that most children were forbidden from entering. However, since he was a favorite child he knew at worst he would get a slap on the wrist for his curiosity. That was how it had been, every single time he indulged his curiosity in the past.

He rushed into the old room, and followed shelves that were lined with ancient books, and bound up documents. If reading was the only thing he was good at, he would use it now. He pulled several books off the shelf and started through them. As he worked he did not know how much time had passed, only that it took him quite a while and his back was starting to hurt from how hunched over he was reading over the old family lines.  
  
“Nimura…”  
  
All alone in this room, with nothing more than the books he had to tell him the truth, Nimura looked around and saw an aged old man with a beard and long white hair that obscured most of the features of his face.”What are you doing?”  
  
Just as he thought, rather than being disciplined, when he heard of Nimura’s break in to the records room, Tsuneyoshi decided to deal with it himself. He walked forward, arms folded. “Tsuneyoshi… sir.”  Nimura said without turning back his head.  
  
Tsuneyoshi walked over to him, sitting down behind him. He peered over his shoulder and read along with Nimura. “A family tree?”  
  
To refute Hairu’s claims, that was where Nimura had decided to go looking. However, he found exactly what she told him. Several members in both his own house, and Arima’s house who all had incredibly short spans of time listed as their life span. “We’re sorta short lived, aren’t we? Everyone on here died around 30.”  
  
The old man closed his eyes. “Washuu that are not of the main family… like you, Furuta, and Arima, and Kaiko, happen to be that way, yes.”  
  
“Are we ill?” Nimura searched for any other answer than what Hairu’s words implied, and what everything he had observed looking at the family tree suggested.  
  
“No. It is your blood. Our ancestors were selfish. It is not yet a tale I can tell you.”

“I see…” The boy paused, the eye which was over his mole looked down. He pulled his lips tight for a moment in hesitation. “I guess…. I’ve just got to do everything I want to, in the time I have, huh?”  
  
He said, a simple optimistic statement just like a child would make. Just like the one Hairu had told him when she learned the news. His lips pulled themselves into a perfect smile, he closed his eyes, his face the perfect one of innocence.  
  
In that moment he thanked his mother for her warnings. _Always smile around your father._ If he let even a fraction of what was going on inside of his head show, it would all be over right then.

 _Our ancestors were selfish?_ _  
_ _Then what about you._ _  
_ _Illegitimate children…_ _  
_ _No, that was a lie._ _  
_ _That implies we were an accident._ _  
_ _I’m not the only one._ _  
_ _Kishou Arima is my half brother._ _  
_ _I looked at the family tree, all of those ‘affairs’ that produced illegitimate children were planned ahead of time._ _  
_ _We’re not an accident._ _  
_ _We’re not a blessing._ _  
_ _It’s far too methodical for that.  
__You're keeping records...  
No, pedigrees.  
_ _We're bred…_ _  
_ _  
_ That moment Nimura realized, that the reason he was never going to grow up, that he would never be able to keep his promise to Rize was because of the selfish decision of his father. That his father had condemned both him, and his mother to this fate, all of the strings which had tenuously been holding him loyal to the Washuu, that had been reassuring himself that he was loved, that he was lucky to have been born here, that he was taken care of, they all snapped at once.  
  
That ‘love’ that was given to him, was nothing more than the webs of a spider, spiraling around and catching a butterfly within its grasp. He was the butterfly, destined to live oblivious and die early.  
  
If that was the case he had no need for love at all.  
_I’ll burn this entire web._ _  
_ That was what he thought, as he smiled so gently in his father’s embrace.  
It was a childish emotion, usually the kind that would be fleeting, the notion of revenge would never sit well in that of a powerless child, it would remain a fantasy forever.  
  
However, Nimura was desperate to cling to that emotion as he realized if he was destined to die early, than, this burning revenge was all that would remain of him after he died. After all, scars like burns were impossible to heal, if they were dealt to the earth they took generations to recover from.  
  
Every string had snapped in his heart at that moment, but that was not entirely true. THere was one string remaining, and it made Nimura hesitate and open his eyes.

 _If I burn this entire place down, then what will happen to Rize?_ _  
_ He thought, and suddenly every fiber of his being told him to stop at once.

  
  
♔

 

Arima stared up at the sky, the real one. It was infinite in size, and infinitely blue, but he saw absolutely nothing in that sky. As the breeze blew his hair in front of his face, he remembered a conversation from a few years ago.  
  
The girl named Minami Uruka had called him up to the rooftop. “It’s odd… Why do you want to meet me when Fura is not around?” Arima said, in his usually calm and withdrawn voice. Despite the fact that she had been waiting up on the rooftop for him, and now sat waiting for him with her arms drawn behind her back and the wind blowing the skirt of her school uniform, he looked away from her.  
  
“Do you like Fura that much more than me?” She asked, giggling. A clear sign that she was just teasing him.

Arima however, answered her overly honestly as usual. “I don’t have an answer for that question.” He said, still looking away.  
  
Minami walked around him, and tried to follow where his gaze was looking. As he kept turning his head to look away from her, she soon figured out that he was just avoiding looking at her. The girl stuck her tongue out to pout, and then on her own moved over and sat on the edge of the rooftop.  
  
“Well, it’s no fair if you boys just do all the bonding and leave me out. I want to have a serious conversation while we’re both sitting down too.” She said, and then she eagerly patted the seat next to her. “Come on, Arima. Sit.”

Arima would not have gone to sit next to her on his own unprompted, but since she told him to, he did just that, sitting and drawing his knees up to his chest. Unlike her he did not let his legs dangle off the side of the roof. “What are we supposed to talk about?”  
  
“Usually when you sit on the rooftop like this, young students talk about the future.”  
  
“Oh, okay…” Arima agreed softly, and then asked her immediately. “What do you dream about being in the future?”  
  
“You don’t have to take what I said so straightforwardly all the time…” Minami muttered, before deciding to just answer his question. “Even though I’m just a transfer student, one day I want to be class representative.”  
  
“Why that?”  
  
“It’s the person that everybody looks to in the class, they’re the center of attention and… they’re like the model student don’t you think? If you stay here you should become class rep with me.”  
  
“I’ll think about it.”  
  
“Okay, what about you. Do you have a dream, Arima?” She asked, turning her head towards him. Arima made a mistake and let himself look directly at her. In that moment he realized, her twin tails, and the childish smile on her face as she discussed just going about her normal life and how much she enjoyed it. Somebody who enjoyed so much, who romanticized so much just doing the little things in life, Arima thought she was truly beautiful.

She was, really alive in that moment. That was why Arima had tried so hard to look away before. Now that he was looking at her though, he could not stop himself. He quietly watched her for a long time, forgetting even to answer her question.  
  
“Come on, tell me.”  
  
Finally, he pursed his lips to answer. “I…”

Arima was interrupted from his remembrance, when the two faceless investigators that had called him to meet with them, arrived. “Did you fall asleep while standing up again, Rank 2 Arima?”  
  
Arima replied with a soft “No.” He tilted his head to the side, looking to the CCG lab that they were standing in front of. “What did you call me here for, none of my quinques need maintenance.”  
  
“One of the recent academy graduates asked for you.”  
  
“He’s lucky, getting a custom quinque when he’s this young. Yet when we brought it out to show it to him, he started yelling and throwing a fit.”  
  
“He only calmed down when we said we’d go find you for him.”  
  
Arima nodded. However, when he saw who it was that was demanding to see him, his lips parted slightly in surprise. To everyone else though, it would look like Arima had made no change in his facial expression at all.  
  
“Fura…”  
  
His hair was no longer orange, but had returned to its natural color. It was now pulled back in a neat and orderly haircut, but, Arima definitely recognized the face of Fura Taishi. So, Fura had finally decided what he wanted to do with his life after all and found himself in the CCG.  
  
Before he could say anything else, Fura moved forward and grabbed Arima by the shoulders. “What’d they do to Minami? Where’s her body.”  
  
“In order to make a quinque the ghouls organs are extracted, and then the rest of the body is grinded up for RC cells-”  
  
“They didn’t bury it… They didn’t bury her body, they just made her into that.”  
  
“Yes, she’s right there.” Arima’s eyes followed to the suitcase that was sitting at Fura’s side, completely untouched. “That is all that remains of Minami. The rest of the pieces of the body are recycled for efficiency-”  
  
“What the fuck! How can you talk about all of this so calmly? You’re saying that after we killed Minami they just ripped her apart for spare parts? Those bunch of sickoes with her body they-”  
  
“What does it matter.” Arima tilted his head. “She’s already dead. Once you’re dead, that dead body has absolutely nothing in common with a living person”  
  
“But why…”  
  
“It’s the most efficient way to fight ghouls. You can’t kill a ghoul with a baseball bat with nails in it Fura, it won’t work.”  
  
“But I knew her when she was alive… how am I supposed to just… swing around her corpse.” He shook Arima by the shoulders, but Arima gave little response. Even as he felt Fura’s fingers tighten around the fabric of his white jacket. “Do you really feel nothing at all about this?”  
  
“No. I don’t.” He said simply. Fura looked over his features for even the slightest bit of hesitation, but he saw nothing at all. Arima's entire image was composed, frozen in place as indifference. Fura let go of Arima right then.  
  
“Cold bastard…” He said, as he reached into his pocket and flipped open a carton of cigarettes. He plucked out one, and then went searching for a lighter.  
  
“You can’t smoke in here,” Arima informed him.  
  
“I’m going outside…”  
  
“Ah. I see.” Arima looked at the form of Fura’s back as he walked away, already lighting a cigarette. “Then, we’ll talk again later when you’ve calmed down, Fura.”  
  
Just like that, he turned around and left walking in the opposite direction. Arima wondered why Fura wanted to see him of all people. He really should have known, there was nothing Arima could say that would calm him down. There was nothing Arima could give to anybody after all. He was somebody who existed to take away. That was the only reason he held such prominence within the CCG.  
  
If Fura really did join the CCG just to follow his footsteps, he would become exactly like that. It was only that thought that made Arima hesitate, and finally show emotion as the bottom corners of his lips quirked and downturned. That change was so small though, only Arima himself would have noticed it.

 

♔

 

Osamu Dazai once wrote in his work No Longer Human, that he had never once felt hunger in his life, and therefore all food to him was tasteless. Even if he ate, he did not know what feeling full was like.

Arima could relate to that passage of writing. Half humans like him were able to eat human food, but, Arima never once in his life felt food taste like anything other than wet mush, even though he was able to swallow it easily and gain nutrition from it. He did not know if this was the case for other half humans or not.

He knew that little girl Hairu often requested to be gifted sweet food from the outside world. Perhaps, she could taste it, or perhaps she could only taste foods with high amounts of sugar in them that would have a pronounced sweet taste.

 _Oh what irony._ Arima thought as he related to a passage from a book entitled “No Longer Human.” Though, the No Longer part did not apply to him as he never had been human in the first place. You could not be disqualified from a humanity you never possessed.  
  
He made his way to the bathroom, and leaned over the porcelain bowl. Arima unwillingly vomited the tasteless mush of food he had just forced himself to eat. Not because he could not taste it, or his ghoul blood, his stomach was just sick today.  
  
On days of high tension, even if he could repress all emotion on his face, his stomach would always twist against his will like this. As he sat over the bowl for a moment, reaching to flush, he saw something out of the corner of his eye in between the strands of blue hair that had fallen up. There was a girl watching him from the mirror. Red eyes, and twin tails, it was Minami staring at him.  
  
“Hey, Arima why didn’t you look at me today? Didn’t I make a beautiful quinque?”  
  
“...”  
  
“You’re so cold. Do you think you’re better than me? You know, if you just kill whatever they point you at then how are you any different than a quinque?.”  
  
“...”  
  
“Hey, Arima, why is your stomach so bad? Are you aging already? You’re only nineteen you know.”  
  
“...”  
  
“Are you going to come join me soon? Do you remember what I called myself? Jack O Lantern. It’s based off a story about a man who couldn’t go to heaven or hell, so he just wandered alone for eternity. Isn’t that a lot like you? You can’t go to the heaven for humans, or the hell meant for ghouls. That makes me a little sad though, it means I’ll never see you again once your hair turns all the way white and you die.”  
  
“...”  
  
“Why won’t you talk to me? You killed me you could at least look at me.”  
  
“...” He was instructed by the Washuu, never to talk to ghouls, never to sympathize with them. He walked past the image of Minami, still calling out for him, and calling him cold like Fura had earlier this day. He wiped his mouth clean and made his way all the way to the door.  
  
A man in a black suit appeared in the doorway. His face was covered by shadow, but if he could see it Arima was sure that it would have looked mostly rotted away. “Are you doing alright on your own, Kishou?” The man asked him.  
  
“Arima, look at me…Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, look.” Minami appeared in the window near his door, calling out to him again. He could see flowers where Minami was, but Arima would not look her way.  
  
He kept his eyes forward on the man in the black suit. He was given this apartment as a special privilege for defeating the owl. Rank 2 Investigator, Arima Kishou, 19 years old. He was a favorite of the CCG and was able to assume a position as a rank 3 investigator after being selected personally by Head Chairman Washuu as a special case. In just a short year, he had already raised his rank by one. Furthermore, he was a young talent who had been selected for that day’s battle tactics.  
  
He used the many special investigator’s quinques and threw them aside, and he worked his way up to the owl’s chest. A battle between the “genius” Rank 2 Arima and the “Calamity” One-Eyed Owl.

To the other investigators, it had been a source of inspiration, a legend. However, Kishou Arima felt nothing about that day at all. He was simply killing the ghoul in front of him just like he had been told to do. That was no different from what he normally did.  
  
It was nice living on his own at least, he supposed, though the check ups were frequent. “I’m fine. Just working on another case while off duty.”  
  
The man in the hat pulled the brim of his hat over his face. “That’s fine then, don’t work yourself too hard Kishou. You’ll wear yourself out.”  
  
When he had turned away and left, only then did Kishou Arima speak again. “It’s not nice to lie Kaiko.” He said, before averting his eyes slightly to the side. “That’s exactly what you want to happen to me.”

  
♔

  
The case which he worked on all on his own, was a follow up to that mission that made him famous that day he faced down the One Eyed Owl. He had a strange feeling, like the owl he was fighting against despite tearing through all those investigators easily was not trying to kill him.  
  
He went back and reviewed old tapes and footage, and saw two distinct differences between the one eyed owl that once attacked the 2nd ward headquarters and was repelled by Kuroiwa, and then the owl that attacked two times afterwards.

He considered going to V and reporting this information, but for some reason his instincts told him that V was likely already aware of this information of the second owl. In that case, Arima decided it was better to find out on his own.

Recently he had been tracking the sightings of an absurdly powerful ukaku ghoul in the 23rd ward, living on the streets. As he went over the case files, he took in the information and applied the formulas to it he had learned from past experience. Ghoul hunting was nothing more than algebra, you simply needed to follow the formulas and techniques that were laid out for you absolutely and you would find the answer.  
  
In that moment like a single beam of light, parting from the clouds he had a moment of revelation of where this strange ukaku ghoul that he was pursuing would show up next. Even though it was the middle of the night he called the investigators that were on his squad.

 

♔

 

  
She had appeared in front of the fox shrine just like Arima predicted. In his black uniform, and CCG armor he stood in front of her. The faceless investigators on his squad behind him saw the Kakuja of the ghoul falling apart and assumed she was already dead.  
  
“Arima. We must go back right now and report that you found the one eyed owl.”  
  
Keeping Yukimura 1/3rd on his shoulder, he looked ahead emotionlessly at the mass that was the Kakuja of the owl until one moment ago. His eyes disappeared behind the glare of his glasses. When fighting the owl, just as he suspected it was different than last time. Rather than the owl screaming and fleeing, he had saw something fall out of the mass of the Kakuja.  
  
It was a little girl, crawling out, covered in rags and bandages. He stepped forward slowly, ignoring the investigators behind him. “Please go ahead, I’ll clean up any last trace of the ghoul here.”  
  
His footsteps were slow, and to him each one of them sounded loud. Tap, tap, tap, those were the heavy steps of the reaper. He knew those footsteps heralded the deaths of all ghouls that heard him. As he stepped forward though he saw himself stepping in a field of flowers.  
  
The blood and gore disappeared behind the blooming flowers. He saw that girl, hiding behind the flesh of her Kakuja, laying down in the flower field too. The faceless investigators called out from behind him. “Is there something wrong?”  
  
“No… it’s nothing..”  
  
_This is the One Eyed Owl._ _  
_ _The owl that threatens father’s… no… V’s balance._ _  
_ _  
_ _I must kill it._

His hand tightened around Yukimura as he leveled his blade at the girl’s throat. He had not been expecting her to be a girl.

_I must._

She was around Minami’s age when he first met her.  
  
A voice called out to him.

It was Minami’s.

She wrapped her hands around his throat just as he held his quinque up to make the final blow. Another hand of hers wrapped around the hands he held the quinque with, holding it with an intimate touch.

“Hey, you didn’t want to kill me that day, did you? But what does it matter, you killed me anyway. That doesn’t make what you did any less bad.”  
  
“...”  
  
“Come on, kill her just like you killed me.”  
  
“...”  
  
“Sparing this one ghoul won’t change all the others you killed so far.”  
  
“...”  
  
“It won’t undo my death either.”  
  
_KIll. Kill. Kill. Kill._

Suddenly, he remembered. On the rooftop that day with Minami, as he watched her turn her head and look out at the sky, the wind blowing her hair vibrantly full of life. The question she asked him, just now he remembered what he wanted to answer her with.

 _A knight._ _  
_ _A knight in fairy tales, the kind that can protect others with a sword._ _  
_ _But, Minami, as I grew older I learned there was no such thing as fighting to protect others._ _  
_ _You can’t protect others with a sword._ _  
_ _You can only cut._ _  
_ _You can only tear apart._

 _You can only kill.  
_  
“The one eyed owl was repelled but they escaped.” Kishou Arima said suddenly, as he cut open the Kakuja with a slice of his quinque. “They must have shed their kakuja as a distraction when they realized they were losing.”

As the other investigators left to make that report, Kishou Arima stared at the girl with the uneven gaze. One of her eyes was red, and the other green. Just like him she was asymmetrical, lopsided. He met her eyes, unable to say anything.  
  
The two of them stood together in a field of flowers staring at one another.

She had appeared in front of the fox shrine just like Arima predicted. In his black uniform, and CCG armor he stood in front of her. The faceless investigators on his squad behind him saw the Kakuja of the ghoul falling apart and assumed she was already dead.  
  
“Arima. We must go back right now and report that you found the one eyed owl.”  
  
Keeping Yukimura 1/3rd on his shoulder, he looked ahead emotionlessly at the mass that was the Kakuja of the owl until one moment ago. His eyes disappeared behind the glare of his glasses. When fighting the owl, just as he suspected ti was different than last time rather than the owl screaming and fleeing, he had saw something fall out of the mass of the Kakuja.  
  
It was a little girl, crawling out, covered in rags and bandages. He stepped forward slowly, ignoring the investigators behind him. “Please go ahead, I’ll clean up any last trace of the ghoul here.”  
  
His footsteps were slow, and to him each one of them sounded loud. Tap, tap, tap, those were the heavy steps of the reaper. He knew those footsteps heralded the deaths of all ghouls that heard him. As he stepped forward though he saw himself stepping in a field of flowers.  
  
The blood and gore disappeared behind the blooming flowers. He saw that girl, hiding behind the flesh of her Kakuja, laying down in the flower field too. The faceless investigators called out from behind him. “Is there something wrong?”  
  
“No… it’s nothing..”  
  
_This is the One Eyed Owl._ _  
__The owl that threatens father’s… no… V’s balance._ _  
__  
__I must kill it._

His hand tightened around Yukimura as he leveled his blade at the girl’s throat. He had not been expecting her to be a girl.  
_I must._

She was around Minami’s age when he first met her.  
  
A voice called out to him.  
It was Minami’s.  
She wrapped her hands around his throat just as he held his quinque up to make the final blow. Another hand of hers wrapped around the hands he held the quinque with, holding it with an intimate touch.

“Hey, you didn’t want to kill me that day, did you? But what does it matter, you killed me anyway. That doesn’t make what you did any less bad.”  
  
“...”  
  
“Come on, kill her just like you killed me.”  
  
“...”  
  
“Sparing this one ghoul won’t change all the others you killed so far.”  
  
“...”  
  
“It won’t undo my death either.”  
  
_KIll. Kill. Kill. Kill._

Suddenly, he remembered. On the rooftop that day with Minami, as he watched her turn her head and look out at the sky, the wind blowing her hair vibrantly full of life. The question she asked him, just now he remembered what he wanted to answer her with.

 _A knight._ _  
_ _A knight in fairy tales, the kind that can protect others with a sword._ _  
_ _But, Minami as I grew older I learned there was not such thing as fighting to protect others._ _  
_ _You can’t protect others with a sword._ _  
_ _You can only cut._ _  
_ _You can only tear apart._

 _You can only kill.  
_  
“The one eyed owl was repelled but they escaped escaped.” Kishou Arima said suddenly, as he cut open the Kakuja with a slice of his quinque. “They must have shed their kakuja as a distraciton when they realized they were losing.”

As the other investigators left to make that report, Kishou Arima stared at the girl with the uneven gaze. One of her eyes was red, and the other green. Just like him she was asymmetrical, lopsided. He met her eyes, unable to say anything.  
  
The two of them stood together in a field of flowers staring at one another.

♔

That next day, Kishou Arima tried to read the works of Osamu Dazai in peace and quiet in his own apartment. However, there was a girl next to him, loudly eating raw meat with her bare hands. He was the one who had brought her a plate full of meat, and he was also the one who had carried her here after she lost consciousness.

He had nobody to blame for himself for he current noises disturbing his peace. Yet, rather than acknowledge it, he continued to stare at his book.  _In the end I didn’t ill her. What should I do now?_ He thought to himself.  
  
He hesitated, when he saw a little girl climb out of the flesh monster that was the Kakuja. However her personality was much more like what he had faced when fighting the one eyed owl. Bold, strong willed, unable to abide by anyone. Even in her weakened state from the moment she woke up, she started o bark questions and make demands of him.  
  
A little girl with messy green hair, wearing nothing but rags, had been ordering him around all day. Even though he was the one who saved her life, and Arima to keep her quiet simply went along with what she said. He even had procured her a plate of human meat.  
  
“Where did you get this from?” She asked.  
  
“...”  
  
“How are you so strong even though you’re just a snot nosed kid?”  
  
“...”  _I’m just a snot nosed kid._  
  
“You’re basically a twig there’s no meat on you you’d be unappetizing to eat. You don’t look nearly as strong as a beefy guy like Kuroiwa or Urie.”  
  
“...”  _I’m too skinny, too?_ _  
__  
_ “Why won’t you answer any of my questions?” She demanded.  
  
“... I’m not allowed to talk to ghouls.” Arima finally said, before looking at the pages of his book once again.  
  
Eto looked away, hesitating for a moment. “Th-...” Whether she liked it or not, she would be dead if not for this man, yet at the same time he was also the reason she was in this pathetic condition. “Thank you…” She finally said.  
  
Arima put his book down and turned to look at her for a moment. However, he said nothing. He would rather not show the new emotions that were stirring inside of him. In fact, he preferred to be thought of as a cold bastard than give away even an inkling of what he was feeling at this moment as he looked at her.

♚

  
After thinking things through, Nimura had gone to find Rize. After looking through the compound all day, he found her at the absolute edge of it, sitting with her legs crossed. In the field of flowers with her he called out her name.  
  
“Rize.”  
  
She turned around to look at him. “What is it, Nimura?”  
  
“Were you also bred?” The question that had been hanging on his mind all day. As the dice rolled back and forth in his head, the answer to that question would determine how they were cast.  
  
Once that happened, there was no going back for him, he already decided.  
  
She took a long time to answer. Nimura, realizing that she must have unlike him known all along sunk further and further into the pits of self hatred. The time spent with Rize were a lie. His promise of things staying fun even when they were grown up, was a lie. Happiness with Rize never existed. No, the Rize that he knew never existed in the first place.  
  
This entire time alone, she carried the burden of being a bred child, while he believed the lies of the Washuu and played in the flower fields like an idiot. He assumed the happiness for himself, was her happiness as well.  
  
After the longest time, a moment that felt like an eternity, which was probably too long considering how short the time Nimura had left was she finally answered him, looking away from him and only at the flowers. “...Yes.”  
  
_That’s it… I’ve decided._ _  
__Rize, I won’t let you be destroyed along with the Washuu._ _  
__I don’t care about everybody else, they can all go die but…_ _  
__You have to live._ _  
__I’ll probably die with them so._ _  
__You can be the proof that I was ever alive._ _  
  
_

Nimura put on a fake smile then. “Thanks for telling me.”  
  
_You know the story, about the man who killed and killed and killed, but he spared one spider. It was the only good deed in his life. That’s the only good thing I need to do Rize, you’re all that I need._ _  
__  
_ He thought, reassuring himself as he walked away.  
  
A few weeks later, Kishou Arima returned to the garden again. He saw that the children were already in the middle of their training. However, one of the bunch looked particularly young and baby faced, he was facing the oldest member of the group however. A V member who was bald, and whose face had been mostly rotting away just like Kaiko’s.  
  
“He’s taken an adult as his partner. Who is that?”  
  
“The Furuta Branch Family’s youngest child. Why the sudden cruiousity, Kishou.” Chika said, next to him, turning his head to the side to follow the gaze of the blue haired boy.  
  
“His form is quite good.”  
  
“He seemed like a timid sort of boy, the kind that’d play with the daughters in flowers, but now that he’s applying himself suddenly his fundamentals are decent.”  
  
In the background, as Nimura finished up the sparring match he wiped the sweat from his brow. He put on another fake smile, and thanked the rotten old man for beating up on him, and trying too hard in a sparring match with a child. “Thank you for the lesson.”  
  
Chika continued with his explanation. “And, like his mother he is loved. Tsuneyoshi dotes on him more than any of the other illegitimate children.” That being said, he sits at the foot of the Washuu Table.”  
  
Arima watched Nimura take another step forward as he moved onto the next sparring match so soon.  
  
“His ceiling is set.”

She had appeared in front of the fox shrine just like Arima predicted. In his black uniform, and CCG armor he stood in front of her. The faceless investigators on his squad behind him saw the Kakuja of the ghoul falling apart and assumed she was already dead.  
  
“Arima. We must go back right now and report that you found the one eyed owl.”  
  
Keeping Yukimura 1/3rd on his shoulder, he looked ahead emotionlessly at the mass that was the Kakuja of the owl until one moment ago. His eyes disappeared behind the glare of his glasses. When fighting the owl, just as he suspected ti was different than last time rather than the owl screaming and fleeing, he had saw something fall out of the mass of the Kakuja.  
  
It was a little girl, crawling out, covered in rags and bandages. He stepped forward slowly, ignoring the investigators behind him. “Please go ahead, I’ll clean up any last trace of the ghoul here.”  
  
His footsteps were slow, and to him each one of them sounded loud. Tap, tap, tap, those were the heavy steps of the reaper. He knew those footsteps heralded the deaths of all ghouls that heard him. As he stepped forward though he saw himself stepping in a field of flowers.  
  
The blood and gore disappeared behind the blooming flowers. He saw that girl, hiding behind the flesh of her Kakuja, laying down in the flower field too. The faceless investigators called out from behind him. “Is there something wrong?”  
  
“No… it’s nothing..”  
  
_This is the One Eyed Owl._ _  
__The owl that threatens father’s… no… V’s balance._ _  
__  
__I must kill it._

His hand tightened around Yukimura as he leveled his blade at the girl’s throat. He had not been expecting her to be a girl.  
_I must._

She was around Minami’s age when he first met her.  
  
A voice called out to him.  
It was Minami’s.  
She wrapped her hands around his throat just as he held his quinque up to make the final blow. Another hand of hers wrapped around the hands he held the quinque with, holding it with an intimate touch.

“Hey, you didn’t want to kill me that day, did you? But what does it matter, you killed me anyway. That doesn’t make what you did any less bad.”  
  
“...”  
  
“Come on, kill her just like you killed me.”  
  
“...”  
  
“Sparing this one ghoul won’t change all the others you killed so far.”  
  
“...”  
  
“It won’t undo my death either.”  
  
_KIll. Kill. Kill. Kill._

Suddenly, he remembered. On the rooftop that day with Minami, as he watched her turn her head and look out at the sky, the wind blowing her hair vibrantly full of life. The question she asked him, just now he remembered what he wanted to answer her with.

 _A knight._ _  
_ _A knight in fairy tales, the kind that can protect others with a sword._ _  
_ _But, Minami as I grew older I learned there was not such thing as fighting to protect others._ _  
_ _You can’t protect others with a sword._ _  
_ _You can only cut._ _  
_ _You can only tear apart._

 _You can only kill.  
_  
“The one eyed owl was repelled but they escaped escaped.” Kishou Arima said suddenly, as he cut open the Kakuja with a slice of his quinque. “They must have shed their kakuja as a distraciton when they realized they were losing.”

As the other investigators left to make that report, Kishou Arima stared at the girl with the uneven gaze. One of her eyes was red, and the other green. Just like him she was asymmetrical, lopsided. He met her eyes, unable to say anything.  
  
The two of them stood together in a field of flowers staring at one another.

♔

That next day, Kishou Arima tried to read the works of Osamu Dazai in peace and quiet in his own apartment. However, there was a girl next to him, loudly eating raw meat with her bare hands. He was the one who had brought her a plate full of meat, and he was also the one who had carried her here after she lost consciousness.

He had nobody to blame for himself for he current noises disturbing his peace. Yet, rather than acknowledge it, he continued to stare at his book.  _In the end I didn’t ill her. What should I do now?_ He thought to himself.  
  
He hesitated, when he saw a little girl climb out of the flesh monster that was the Kakuja. However her personality was much more like what he had faced when fighting the one eyed owl. Bold, strong willed, unable to abide by anyone. Even in her weakened state from the moment she woke up, she started o bark questions and make demands of him.  
  
A little girl with messy green hair, wearing nothing but rags, had been ordering him around all day. Even though he was the one who saved her life, and Arima to keep her quiet simply went along with what she said. He even had procured her a plate of human meat.  
  
“Where did you get this from?” She asked.  
  
“...”  
  
“How are you so strong even though you’re just a snot nosed kid?”  
  
“...”  _I’m just a snot nosed kid._  
  
“You’re basically a twig there’s no meat on you you’d be unappetizing to eat. You don’t look nearly as strong as a beefy guy like Kuroiwa or Urie.”  
  
“...”  _I’m too skinny, too?_ _  
__  
_ “Why won’t you answer any of my questions?” She demanded.  
  
“... I’m not allowed to talk to ghouls.” Arima finally said, before looking at the pages of his book once again.  
  
Eto looked away, hesitating for a moment. “Th-...” Whether she liked it or not, she would be dead if not for this man, yet at the same time he was also the reason she was in this pathetic condition. “Thank you…” She finally said.  
  
Arima put his book down and turned to look at her for a moment. However, he said nothing. He would rather not show the new emotions that were stirring inside of him. In fact, he preferred to be thought of as a cold bastard than give away even an inkling of what he was feeling at this moment as he looked at her.

♚

  
After thinking things through, Nimura had gone to find Rize. After looking through the compound all day, he found her at the absolute edge of it, sitting with her legs crossed. In the field of flowers with her he called out her name.  
  
“Rize.”  
  
She turned around to look at him. “What is it, Nimura?”  
  
“Were you also bred?” The question that had been hanging on his mind all day. As the dice rolled back and forth in his head, the answer to that question would determine how they were cast.  
  
Once that happened, there was no going back for him, he already decided.  
  
She took a long time to answer. Nimura, realizing that she must have unlike him known all along sunk further and further into the pits of self hatred. The time spent with Rize were a lie. His promise of things staying fun even when they were grown up, was a lie. Happiness with Rize never existed. No, the Rize that he knew never existed in the first place.  
  
This entire time alone, she carried the burden of being a bred child, while he believed the lies of the Washuu and played in the flower fields like an idiot. He assumed the happiness for himself, was her happiness as well.  
  
After the longest time, a moment that felt like an eternity, which was probably too long considering how short the time Nimura had left was she finally answered him, looking away from him and only at the flowers. “...Yes.”  
  
_That’s it… I’ve decided._ _  
__Rize, I won’t let you be destroyed along with the Washuu._ _  
__I don’t care about everybody else, they can all go die but…_ _  
__You have to live._ _  
__I’ll probably die with them so._ _  
__You can be the proof that I was ever alive._ _  
  
_

Nimura put on a fake smile then. “Thanks for telling me.”  
  
_You know the story, about the man who killed and killed and killed, but he spared one spider. It was the only good deed in his life. That’s the only good thing I need to do Rize, you’re all that I need._ _  
__  
_ He thought, reassuring himself as he walked away.  
  
A few weeks later, Kishou Arima returned to the garden again. He saw that the children were already in the middle of their training. However, one of the bunch looked particularly young and baby faced, he was facing the oldest member of the group however. A V member who was bald, and whose face had been mostly rotting away just like Kaiko’s.  
  
“He’s taken an adult as his partner. Who is that?”  
  
“The Furuta Branch Family’s youngest child. Why the sudden cruiousity, Kishou.” Chika said, next to him, turning his head to the side to follow the gaze of the blue haired boy.  
  
“His form is quite good.”  
  
“He seemed like a timid sort of boy, the kind that’d play with the daughters in flowers, but now that he’s applying himself suddenly his fundamentals are decent.”  
  
In the background, as Nimura finished up the sparring match he wiped the sweat from his brow. He put on another fake smile, and thanked the rotten old man for beating up on him, and trying too hard in a sparring match with a child. “Thank you for the lesson.”  
  
Chika continued with his explanation. “And, like his mother he is loved. Tsuneyoshi dotes on him more than any of the other illegitimate children.” That being said, he sits at the foot of the Washuu Table.”  
  
Arima watched Nimura take another step forward as he moved onto the next sparring match so soon.  
  
“His ceiling is set.”

That next day, Kishou Arima tried to read the works of Osamu Dazai in peace and quiet in his own apartment. However, there was a girl next to him, loudly eating raw meat with her bare hands. He was the one who had brought her a plate full of meat, and he was also the one who had carried her here after she lost consciousness.

He had nobody to blame for himself for the current noises disturbing his peace. Yet, rather than acknowledge it, he continued to stare at his book. _In the end I didn’t kill her. What should I do now?_ He thought to himself.  
  
He hesitated, when he saw a little girl climb out of the flesh monster that was the Kakuja. However her personality was much more like what he had faced when fighting the one eyed owl. Bold, strong-willed, unable to abide by anyone. Even in her weakened state from the moment she woke up, she started to bark questions and make demands of him.  
  
A little girl with messy green hair, wearing nothing but rags, had been ordering him around all day. Even though he was the one who saved her life, and Arima to keep her quiet simply went along with what she said. He even had procured her a plate of human meat.  
  
“Where did you get this from?” She asked.  
  
“...”  
  
“How are you so strong even though you’re just a snot nosed kid?”  
  
“...” _I’m just a snot nosed kid._  
  
“You’re basically a twig, there’s no meat on you, you’d be unappetizing to eat. You don’t look nearly as strong as a beefy guy like Kuroiwa or Urie.”  
  
“...” _I’m too skinny, too?_ _  
_ _  
_ “Why won’t you answer any of my questions?” She demanded.  
  
“... I’m not allowed to talk to ghouls.” Arima finally said, before looking at the pages of his book once again.  
  
Eto looked away, hesitating for a moment. “Th-...” Whether she liked it or not, she would be dead if not for this man, yet at the same time, he was also the reason she was in this pathetic condition. “Thank you…” She finally said.  
  
Arima put his book down and turned to look at her for a moment. However, he said nothing. He would rather not show the new emotions that were stirring inside of him. In fact, he preferred to be thought of as a cold bastard than give away even an inkling of what he was feeling at this moment as he looked at her.

♚

  
After thinking things through, Nimura had gone to find Rize. After looking through the compound all day, he found her at the absolute edge of it, sitting with her legs crossed. In the field of flowers with her, he called out her name.  
  
“Rize.”  
  
She turned around to look at him. “What is it, Nimura?”  
  
“Were you also bred?” The question that had been hanging on his mind all day. As the dice rolled back and forth in his head, the answer to that question would determine how they were cast.  
  
Once that happened, there was no going back for him, he already decided.  
  
She took a long time to answer. Nimura, realizing that she must have unlike him known all along sunk further and further into the pits of self hatred. The time spent with Rize were a lie. His promise of things staying fun even when they were grown up, was a lie. Happiness with Rize never existed. No, the Rize that he knew never existed in the first place.  
  
This entire time alone, she carried the burden of being a bred child, while he believed the lies of the Washuu and played in the flower fields like an idiot. He assumed the happiness for himself, was her happiness as well.  
  
After the longest time, a moment that felt like an eternity, which was probably too long considering how short the time Nimura had left was, she finally answered him, looking away from him and only at the flowers. “...Yes.”  
  
_That’s it… I’ve decided._ _  
_ _Rize, I won’t let you be destroyed along with the Washuu._ _  
_ _I don’t care about everybody else, they can all go die but…_ _  
_ _You have to live._ _  
_ _I’ll probably die with them so._ _  
_ _You can be the proof that I was ever alive._ _  
  
_ Nimura put on a fake smile then. “Thanks for telling me.”  
  
_You know the story, about the man who killed and killed and killed, but he spared one spider. It was the only good deed in his life. That’s the only good thing I need to do Rize, you’re all that I need._ _  
_ _  
_ He thought, reassuring himself as he walked away.  
  
A few weeks later, Kishou Arima returned to the garden again. He saw that the children were already in the middle of their training. However, one of the bunch looked particularly young and baby faced, he was facing the oldest member of the group however. A V member who was bald, and whose face had been mostly rotting away just like Kaiko’s.  
  
“He’s taken an adult as his partner. Who is that?”  
  
“The Furuta Branch Family’s youngest child. Why the sudden curiosity, Kishou.” Chika said, next to him, turning his head to the side to follow the gaze of the blue haired boy.  
  
“His form is quite good.”  
  
“He seemed like a timid sort of boy, the kind that’d play with the daughters in flowers, but now that he’s applying himself suddenly his fundamentals are decent.”  
  
In the background, as Nimura finished up the sparring match he wiped the sweat from his brow. He put on another fake smile, and thanked the rotten old man for beating up on him, and trying too hard in a sparring match with a child. “Thank you for the lesson.”  
  
Chika continued with his explanation. “And, like his mother he is loved. Tsuneyoshi dotes on him more than any of the other illegitimate children.” That being said, he sits at the foot of the Washuu Table.”  
  
Arima watched Nimura take another step forward as he moved onto the next sparring match so soon.  
  
“His ceiling is set.”


End file.
